“She is possibly the most overbearing woman I have ever met. I’m almost positive that in her mind her son is still 12 years old.”
Janet* is 33 weeks pregnant with her first child and is absolutely over the moon.
At 19 she was told she was infertile so when she found out she and her husband of three years were expecting, it was the miracle that she thought would never happen.
Yet there is one matter casting a dark shadow over her pending birth and that’s Janet’s mother-in-law who her husband is insisting remains in the delivery suite for their child’s birth.
Janet doesn’t get on too well with her mother-in-law and feels she’s completely unwelcome in the delivery suite.
“She is possibly the most overbearing woman I have ever met. I’m almost positive that in her mind her son is still 12 years old,” Janet wrote in an online forum.
“I got on with her great at the beginning of our relationship but after we moved in together she was at our house literally every single night, and wouldn’t leave until about 10pm,” she added.
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Janet is angry that her husband is insisting her MIL attend their first child’s birth. Image: iStock
“I’m just an incubator for her son’s child”
“She also talks to me as though I’m just an incubator for her son’s child, sometimes she’ll just talk to my stomach without even acknowledging me which feels so dehumanising. She and my husband are very close, but I feel as though I have no time alone with him because she is constantly there,” Janet fumed.
Worst of all, Janet’s husband Graham* doesn’t understand and is insisting that his mother is there at the birth.
“I honestly don’t want her in the delivery room when I give birth, but my husband is adamant on her being there,” she said.
“I feel so selfish, but I want my husband’s support and I don’t feel as though I’ll have it with him constantly tending to her.
“I brought this up with him and he told me I was being ridiculous and selfish, and that I need to get used to her being around a lot.
“I feel as though my birth is going to be so stressful with her around, but my friends have told me just to let her be there and ignore her, and my husband is obviously refusing to let me ban her from coming,” she added.
Giving birth is a private and special moment and many mothers don’t want to be around in-laws. Image: iStock
“He has no right”
Members from the forum were quick to agree with Janet saying she had the right to refuse.
“Tell the nurses that under no circumstances is she to be allowed in. They will listen to your wishes. He cannot overrule them,” wrote one.
Another said that a similar situation had happened with her.
“My MIL begged to be in my delivery room and I refused and she walked into without warning TWICE when I was in labour,” she said.
“Would your man can lay naked with a tiny sheet over him while screaming in pain for a day in front of YOUR family? Absolutely not. You don’t need to give reasoning as to why you don’t want her in there. No is an answer and he needs to accept it. Labour is vulnerable AF and there shouldn’t be an issue with wanted his support, and his support ONLY.”
What would YOU do?